Noa's Birth Story

It all started around 5pm on the 5th. I was getting pretty good contractions at pretty regular intervals though the timing kept changing (8min, 10 min., 5min.). I thought to myself that this was going to be the night and I told Ben too. We did our normal thing and went to bed around 10:30 but I couldn't sleep. The contractions never let up and were getting stronger. By 12:30 I was so uncomfortable I needed Ben to help me get through them with breathing. I waited them out until about 2:30 then took a bath to help ease them. I wanted to call Chrissie--my aunt--to come over but I didn't want to call her at that hour in the morning so we waited until 4:30. I started to get my last minute things packed for the hospital and took a hot shower. We left the house a little after 5am and got to the hospital at 6. The contractions were strong but still not regular, I just knew transition wasn't far off. As I got checked in at the hospital they told me I was at 6cm and I felt very happy to have gotten there when we did. My water still hadn't broken though and I was wondering if/when that would happen. My doula showed up at 7am and the doc came to see me at 10. I was still at 6cm and she offered to break my water but the baby was still floating really high and I was worried about her descending posterior like Gi had so I told her I would wait. I labored to a 7cm and at 4pm I finally let her break my water since my strength was waning and I knew I had a long way to go. After my water was broken all hell broke loose and I went through wicked contractions that left me feeling like I had when they had given me pitocin with Gi. After an hour of that I had them check me and when they said I was at 8cm I was so relieved. Progress! And I had made it past where I had ended making progress with Gi. But I was in serious pain and needed rest so I begged for an epidural and QUICK! It was about 7pm by that point--a full 26 hours into labor--but I finally got some relief. I was tired, hungry, shaking and catching about 15min. of sleep at a time on the epidural. I was thinking a c-section would be inevitable because of my previous experience with the epi and Gi turning posterior but this time, the baby stayed in good position and I kept dilating. They checked me at 10:30 and said I was completely dilated!! You cannot imagine how excited I was! At 11pm the nurses had me start pushing but I really couldn't get it together. The epidural was wearing off but even so the pushing didn't come naturally to me, probably because Noa was still pretty high, only at a zero station. 2 hours of pushing later, the epi had completely worn off and I was back in horrible pain. Each pushing contraction was excruciating and the nurses were getting more and more invasive and aggressive about maneuvering the head and trying to keep it coming down. My efforts were finally paying off and we could see hair and the molding of her head but she just wouldn't descend. By 3:30 I was begging the staff to turn the epi back on and was just screaming through each urge to bear down. Finally my doc arrived, put both her hands inside to see if she could manipulate the baby into a better position (her head was a little asynclitic) but even with that and a good long push on my part, she didn't budge. I just looked at the doc who said, "well.." and I was like, "C-SECTION!".  I was just done. The anesthesiologist came back in, put some meds in my line but it took 3 more agonizing pushing contractions before it stopped the pain. I couldn't do anything but grunt and push even though I knew it wouldn't make the pain go away. That was terrible but at the same time, those last few pushes were the ones that gave me the greatest sense of urgency and completeness about what it is to give birth. Now I understand! I can imagine the rest entirely and leave it to all the other moms of the world!

The whole c-section experience was totally different this time too. There was no pain for one, and it all happened in such a way that I could experience it. Noa was just a stronger baby than Gi was. She cried immediately after birth at 4:14am on the 7th and never let up. She was pink and her apgars were 9 and 9. They cleaned her up 6ft from where I was. My arms were never strapped down and I got to marvel at her for a few minutes before they took her to be cleaned up and weighed and measured. I didn't have to be knocked out so the rest of the surgery didn't take long and as soon as they wheeled me into the recovery room they put Noa on my chest naked and she army crawled to my boob and latched on all by herself! I mean, this is the stuff of natural births not c-sections!

I was and am just so incredibly grateful for having gone through this experience. It was a healing journey even if it was incredibly long and painful. The recovery has been smooth and though more painful in some ways because my perineum was stretched and I had pushed for so long (but no tears), it is less painful in the incision area and I am able to walk and move about, get out of bed etc. with much less pain than I had with Gi. I love knowing I gave it my all, I never let things get out of my control, I called all the shots, (including a little battle over my hep lock not becoming an IV straight away when I arrived) and Ben was the most supportive, most encouraging partner I could have asked for. It really brought us closer to have gone through this together and to have seen what is possible when you're prepared to have the birth you want.

It may not have been a successful VBAC but you cannot control everything and it was the best birth experience for ME under those conditions. I even asked my doc about a third pregnancy and the state of my uterus a day after going through all that! She says there were no areas of thinning in my uterus, not a lot of scarring and she would happily okay me for a third. We'll see about all that of course a LOT later.

Here are some more first photos: